We have a few family members in the business ”” and a lot of tension. It seems like a lot of the disagreement happens when it”™s not clear who is in charge or when one family member has an opinion about what is or isn”™t acceptable for another family member to be doing. Does this happen in other families? What can we do to make things better?
Thoughts of the day: Just about every privately held business is family owned in some aspect and therefore open for conflict. Laying out clear lines of authority can help. Allow people room to make their own decisions, backed up by charging everyone with responsibility for fixing their mistakes. Set rules to clarify level of authority and decision-making power. Set goals to get everyone on the same page.
Whether the business gets discussed at the breakfast table or staff meetings, any time family members weigh in with their opinions, there”™s opportunity for conflict. Conflict can be deep-seated, loaded with family baggage and complicated. Assessing a family member”™s ability to perform can be clouded by your relationship with them. Add in the challenges and pressure that go with running a business and you could be sitting on a powder keg.
Surveys indicate more than half of all privately held businesses have two or more family members working in the business. While the majority of business owners indicate they”™d like to have a family member take over, only about one-third believe that will actually happen.
With the odds stacked against making a great success of employing family members, why do so many try it? There are lots of reasons:
Ӣ The chance to share in building something.
Ӣ Opportunity to keep family members close.
Ӣ Pride that comes from pursuing and succeeding at a common purpose.
Ӣ Creating possibilities for family members to spread their wings.
The trick is to remain focused on the opportunities and to avoid the downsides. Start by agreeing who is in charge of what. Draw up an organization chart. Assign duties and create individual job descriptions. Where there”™s overlap, decide ahead of time who will be in charge in case of disagreement.
Learn when to keep your mouth shut. Most people are too free in the way they dispense advice to others in the family ”” doubly so when working together in the family business. Avoid laying blame, demanding answers or otherwise communicating in anything other than a totally professional manner, especially when talking with other members of the family.
Set up separate workspaces so each family member has a place to go. In times of conflict, encourage the use of space to cool off. Learn to table discussions before they become heated. Come back when all participants have cooled off.
Once assignments are handed out, expect all family members to step up and tackle what”™s on their plates. If they”™re not ready for the responsibility, consider the options ”” reduce duties, get training or assign a mentor. If mistakes are made, hold family members accountable for fixing the problems they created. Don”™t step over them to take charge.
When you first start working together, or by the end of today if you”™re already working together, set up rules on how decisions get made. Define how far any one family member can go in binding the company, spending money, giving out orders to employees, and hiring and firing. Set up a committee to arbitrate disputes.
Family members generally want what”™s best for the company. They want the company to thrive and it”™s in their best interests to make that happen. Conflict usually erupts around the tactics getting from here to there.
Brainstorm and use goals to create a picture of what the future can look like. Post those goals and refer to them regularly. Check that everyone is clear on the next steps that need to happen in order to work toward goals. Review progress regularly to identify what”™s working and where people may need additional support.
Andi Gray is president of Strategy Leaders Inc. (strategyleaders.com), a business-consulting firm that specializes in helping entrepreneurial firms grow. She can be reached at 877-238-3535. Do you have a question for Andi? Send it via email to AskAndi@strategyleaders. Visit AskAndi.com for an entire library of her articles.
