Mark Soboslai
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Every lawyer is a mouthpiece. Mark Soboslai, a divorce lawyer and mediator from Westport, is a one-man band.
“I”™ve always felt the more I could get into the grit and the muck and mire of daily living the better I might be able to write a song,” said Soboslai.
He has chosen the right profession.
Soboslai, 52, grew up in Wallingford.
“We had a piano in the house,” said Soboslai, “though I”™d rather be outside doing something else rather than sitting next to the piano teacher trying to play ”˜Moon River.”™”
Soboslai”™s energy spilled over into percussion in a fife and drum corps. A bout of mononucleosis gave him opportunity to learn guitar.
Armed with knowledge in the piano, guitar and drums, Soboslai marched off to college at the University of Connecticut.
Soboslai, earned bachelor”™s degree in psychology with honors in 1974 and went on to be employed as a family relations counselor with the Connecticut Superior Court, Family Division from 1978 to 1985. He earned his law degree summa cum laude in 1985.
Soboslai went on to become a law clerk at the Connecticut Appellate Court.
In 1986, Soboslai began his practice of law with an emphasis in divorce and family law.
Through college and into his career, music remained his primary retreat from work; he continued to write music, play, and collect instruments.
According to Soboslai, the law business of divorce is by its very nature adversarial and, to remain happy, it demands he partake in some type of departure.
“The whole business of what you do in court can be so nasty at times, especially with people who are going through divorces, your whole days can be filled with others catastrophes,” said Soboslai.
Soboslai also teaches meditation and alternative dispute resolution as an adjunct professor at Quinnipiac University School of Law. Soboslai has even created a course that reflected his two greatest interests, called “Legal Issues in the Music Business.”
“My entire career has been operating on two different sides of this spectrum,” said Soboslai. “On one side, I”™m operating in these battles, this war like adversarial front, and on the other hand I”™ve got this whole mediation and conciliatory thing going on which has been kept alive by teaching.”
According to Soboslai, what he”™s teaching is part of a movement of lawyers becoming more human and personable.
“Music takes it to a whole new level,” said Soboslai. “If you”™re thinking about personal growth, artistic growth or simply achieving something, the whole business of handling legal cases pales in comparison to writing a song. When I”™m feeling more close to the music I feel the growth is more personal.”
Much of Soboslai”™s enthusiasm for music has been amplified by his son.
Known professionally as Josh Kane, 27, Soboslai”™s son has been significantly influenced by his father”™s musical love. Kane is currently a professional drummer in California who plays for many artists including pop stars Pink and Shania Twain and tours with his band Uh Huh Her.
Said Soboslai, “He and I have this great sort of thing that goes on; it”™s a great thing to share.”
After not having played in public for years Soboslai”™s reemergence is the result of him being outfitted by his wife Joan, daughter Rachel and son with an advanced basement studio that is, if anything, watertight.
“You used to not be able to have a place to record in your home,” said Soboslai. “It used to be ridiculously expensive. The Internet now has made it possible for people to be their own publishers. Now I”™m actually learning the studio as an instrument.” So armed, Soboslai has been creating a repertoire of songs that he hopes to perform in the near future.